I say that because I'm speaking to myself as much as to anyone else...
Whether or not you believe in Karma or "The Golden Rule" is irrelevant.
We are instructed, as Christians -- indeed, as civilized human beings -- to treat others how we want to be treated.
I, as much as anyone, still fail at this, miserably.
All too often, my own pride and SELF get in the way of the "bigger picture" Christ wants me to see. I am easily bruised, taking offense when I feel I have been wronged unfairly.
My feelings get hurt and I start to obsess about what I coulda, woulda, shoulda done differently. Or worse, I lash out at the people who I feel have so unjustly caused me aggravation.
HOW DARE THEY?!
I'm also a bit of a perfectionist. I take pride in being responsible and following instructions I am given, so when I feel like I have let someone down -- or that I have somehow overstepped my bounds -- I get pretty upset and boldly defensive.
Goodness knows, the reprimands have been well-deserved at times and I have been humbled by the grace shown to me over and again.
But at other times, I catch myself being less than forgiving when I feel other people have slighted ME.
Really, who do I think I am??
Acts 10: 34 (KJV) states that God is NO respecter of persons.
That means, it doesn't matter what you do for a living, how much money you make, what your position in the church may be, or how much you do for charity.
--->> YOU ARE NO BETTER THAN ANYONE ELSE.
We are all valuable in God's sight and we should treat each other as such.
I think one thing that has done more to harm the image of the Christian Church -- more than anything else -- is the way we so-called "Christians" treat others whom we consider "beneath" us.
If Jesus showed us one thing, plainly, in His short time here on earth, it's that we must humble ourselves to be great. He was the Son of God and yet, He washed the feet of His disciples and treated everyone -- no matter how small or (by society's definition) insignificant -- as precious sheep to bring in to His fold.
There was no attitude of thinking, "I'm better than you," or "You aren't worth my time."
If Jesus is meant to be the example we are to live by, then why do so many Christians do the opposite?
We get full of ourselves and our "positions of importance" and we don't even deign to speak to others in the Church who are not in our "circle of influence."
We might treat the poor and homeless better and as more valuable than we do that church nursery worker or this parking volunteer. We may think because we've been entrusted with great responsibility within our area of ministry that we no longer have to be Jesus to those within our own ministry.
I think this goes on way too much and it needs to STOP.
Again, I am speaking to myself as much as anyone.
Lord knows I need His grace and constant reminders to get over myself and treat others the way Christ would treat them.
If my actions don't loudly proclaim that I am a child of God -- an heir to His kingdom -- then
NOTHING I "say" with my mouth will ever be heard.
As my friend, Carole, often says: "Grace to ME."
Showing posts with label offense. Show all posts
Showing posts with label offense. Show all posts
24 February 2009
14 March 2008
Have You Been BURNED or Slightly Toasted?
We had another awesome morning at the Baton Rouge DREAM CENTER.
Pastor Alliece was attending to other business, so Donna Frank spoke about forgiveness and letting go of guilt and anger and resentment.
She had each woman write something on a slip of paper and deposit it at the foot of a huge, wooden cross... very symbolic & powerful in meaning.
And she stressed the point that if we are truly laying it down (the offense, the guilt, the anger), then we have no right to ever pick it back up again.
When I opened my prayer group, I felt compelled to focus on the subject of offense in the church.
SO MANY people I have talked to no longer go to church because of some sort of offense committed against them by someone in the church. Some of these offenses are quite large, some are amazingly minuscule; it doesn't seem to matter to the offended party.
They have been "burned" by the church and have no inclination of returning there.
I can relate -- as I'm sure most people can.
We all have stories of "offense," but what's interesting is the value we put on offense in the church, as opposed to offense elsewhere... Stay with me here; I do have a point!
When I was in high school, I dated a boy who went to a very conservative, but very charismatic church. He invited me one Saturday to attend a church picnic and told me that we would be playing volleyball and other outdoor games.
I dressed in some nice slacks and a pink sweater (not jeans, not shorts, pants -- honestly, probably too nice to play sports in!).
As we walked up to the picnic grounds, my boyfriend's pastor motioned to him. Not knowing anyone else there, I just kind of stood off to the side, waiting for my friend to return. When he did, he had a look of frustrated disbelief on his face.
"Um, they um, want you to leave. They want you to change into a skirt and come back."
They want me to do what?
We left, but I didn't go change.
I went on a tirade.
I could go on a prolonged rant here about how stupid and insensitive that minister was to do such thing... after all, he didn't know me from Adam! How did he know if I was even a Christian?? What if he missed his single opportunity to reach me for Christ?
And it wasn't as though I was dressed immodestly.
Is this the example Jesus would have us set: Focus on the outward appearance rather than the inner state of the soul?
Guess what?
I still went to church the next Sunday.
Well, admittedly, I didn't go to THAT church, but I didn't let the short-sighted foolishness of one HUMAN minister affect my life-long relationship with the church.
I could say that this was the only bad thing to ever happen to me in a church, but I would be lying. My point, however, is this:
Should we ever allow the foolishness of others to keep us from the love of Christ?
And why do we put a higher priority on the attitudes of our fellow church-goers than we do on the guy who sacks our groceries or the cashier at the gas station? If one of the latter two say something rude to us or act unfriendly, we might get a little huffy, but we don't swear off buying groceries or filling our cars with gas... do we?
A visiting pastor (J. Johns) put it this way:
"Just because your mom burned the biscuits once or twice doesn't keep you from going to the kitchen to eat!"
People in church -- even Christians -- are human, too!
And for those who decide that the grass is always greener somewhere else, here's a news flash for ya:
You will find offense in ANY church, indeed, any WHERE you look for it! There are no perfect churches and certainly no perfect Christians!
We are all capable of fully inserting our feet into our mouths and sometimes we actually walk around like that for awhile before we realize our mistake.
"But shouldn't Christians be held to a higher standard?"
Well, yeah.
BY GOD -- NOT by you!
How does it go?
"judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven:" -- Luke 6:37
Each of us is responsible only for our own behavior and our own choices.
I may have no control over my circumstances or the things that happen to me, but I have every control over how I respond to those circumstances or offending slights. If I deprive myself of the love and forgiveness offered by Christ because someone didn't like my choice of wardrobe, or acted rudely to me, or dared to contradict me, then I am only hurting MYSELF.
And THAT is truly offensive.
Pastor Alliece was attending to other business, so Donna Frank spoke about forgiveness and letting go of guilt and anger and resentment.
She had each woman write something on a slip of paper and deposit it at the foot of a huge, wooden cross... very symbolic & powerful in meaning.
And she stressed the point that if we are truly laying it down (the offense, the guilt, the anger), then we have no right to ever pick it back up again.
When I opened my prayer group, I felt compelled to focus on the subject of offense in the church.
SO MANY people I have talked to no longer go to church because of some sort of offense committed against them by someone in the church. Some of these offenses are quite large, some are amazingly minuscule; it doesn't seem to matter to the offended party.
They have been "burned" by the church and have no inclination of returning there.
I can relate -- as I'm sure most people can.
We all have stories of "offense," but what's interesting is the value we put on offense in the church, as opposed to offense elsewhere... Stay with me here; I do have a point!
When I was in high school, I dated a boy who went to a very conservative, but very charismatic church. He invited me one Saturday to attend a church picnic and told me that we would be playing volleyball and other outdoor games.
I dressed in some nice slacks and a pink sweater (not jeans, not shorts, pants -- honestly, probably too nice to play sports in!).
As we walked up to the picnic grounds, my boyfriend's pastor motioned to him. Not knowing anyone else there, I just kind of stood off to the side, waiting for my friend to return. When he did, he had a look of frustrated disbelief on his face.
"Um, they um, want you to leave. They want you to change into a skirt and come back."
They want me to do what?
We left, but I didn't go change.
I went on a tirade.
I could go on a prolonged rant here about how stupid and insensitive that minister was to do such thing... after all, he didn't know me from Adam! How did he know if I was even a Christian?? What if he missed his single opportunity to reach me for Christ?
And it wasn't as though I was dressed immodestly.
Is this the example Jesus would have us set: Focus on the outward appearance rather than the inner state of the soul?
Guess what?
I still went to church the next Sunday.
Well, admittedly, I didn't go to THAT church, but I didn't let the short-sighted foolishness of one HUMAN minister affect my life-long relationship with the church.
I could say that this was the only bad thing to ever happen to me in a church, but I would be lying. My point, however, is this:
Should we ever allow the foolishness of others to keep us from the love of Christ?
And why do we put a higher priority on the attitudes of our fellow church-goers than we do on the guy who sacks our groceries or the cashier at the gas station? If one of the latter two say something rude to us or act unfriendly, we might get a little huffy, but we don't swear off buying groceries or filling our cars with gas... do we?
A visiting pastor (J. Johns) put it this way:
"Just because your mom burned the biscuits once or twice doesn't keep you from going to the kitchen to eat!"
People in church -- even Christians -- are human, too!
And for those who decide that the grass is always greener somewhere else, here's a news flash for ya:
You will find offense in ANY church, indeed, any WHERE you look for it! There are no perfect churches and certainly no perfect Christians!
We are all capable of fully inserting our feet into our mouths and sometimes we actually walk around like that for awhile before we realize our mistake.
"But shouldn't Christians be held to a higher standard?"
Well, yeah.
BY GOD -- NOT by you!
How does it go?
"judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven:" -- Luke 6:37
Each of us is responsible only for our own behavior and our own choices.
I may have no control over my circumstances or the things that happen to me, but I have every control over how I respond to those circumstances or offending slights. If I deprive myself of the love and forgiveness offered by Christ because someone didn't like my choice of wardrobe, or acted rudely to me, or dared to contradict me, then I am only hurting MYSELF.
And THAT is truly offensive.
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