22 August 2007
A Method to My Madness...
Ok, without getting all "preachy" or weird on you, I have to say, there is a *reason* why I am doing Elevate. This was not a whim or a passing fancy. I wasn't bored or looking for MORE things to fill up my time (God knows my calendar is already over-filled!). Some of you won't understand what I say here; it will be as though I am speaking a foreign language... you'll think, "She's lost it. The stress finally got to her; she's gone off the deep end." =) I assure you I am in full control of my sensibilities... (I think)
About a year ago, God showed me a vision He had for my life. I am very excited about this vision and fully believe it will come to be. That may sound crazy to some of you -- especially if you are not a Christian. I had a dream about something very real to me and I felt commissioned to do something about it. No, I didn't "hear" God's voice in the literal sense of the word, but I had this dream that I could not shake and then the strangest thing happened... Over a period of about 3 months, I had this vision reinforced or re-revealed to me in various ways that, even now, amaze me.
So, Ok, I thought; I'm supposed to do this thing. Now what?
I knew that I had a LOT of work to do before I could complete the task. I will be the first to acknowledge that I am not perfect. I know some of you will be amazed to learn this about me, but trust me, it's true.
I have issues with trust and anger and I struggle with my weight and self-esteem... and well, you get the picture. I want so much to help others, but as they say, you can't help anyone until you help yourself.
Anyway, I have been volunteering down at the Baton Rouge Dream Center for about 8 months now and it occurred to me as I was praying with these precious ladies that I needed healing as much as they do. Some of these women have been through hades and back... there are stories of drug and alcohol addiction, homelessness, abuse, prostitution, abandonment, hatred, and neglect... some of their stories will break your heart.
But how could I minister to them when I had not dealt with MY OWN baggage?
Obviously I couldn't, so I began praying for my own healing and peace about things that had happened in my life. That's when I felt God nudging me toward Elevate and I just knew that I was meant to do this. I'm not doing it with any motive other than to seek God's will for my life and to grow spiritually. I have no pre-conceived notions of what lies beyond Elevate and I have no pretense of being anything more than what God wants me to be.
But I figure: you get ONE LIFE.
It's up to us how we spend it and at the end of my life, I want no regrets.
I want to live my life with VISION and with PURPOSE and not feel that my days were wasted or that I am leaving no legacy behind...
So, I ask you to consider this:
What will be YOUR legacy?